What I love about Today

1. Waking up at 5:30 a.m.

2. To stand in line for Three Hours 

3. With Three children (one who repeats "are we going to daycare?" every five seconds)

4. To get a flu vaccine*

_________________________

*I better not get sick 

Conversations

Nev: I hate speedbumps.

Me: Well, maybe you should write the Mayor and tell him about it.

Nev: What's a Mayor?

Dex: Neville, speed bumps are important. They save lives! Without speed bumps you drive too fast. And people get killed. See that baby in the stroller? Speedbumps make sure we drive slowly and don't run them over.

Nev: Oh.

Me: ah....right. Best not complain to the city then.

Today's Charms

Spontaneous street hockey with the 7 year-old neighbourhood boys. 

Then kicking their asses. (Me: 4, Them: 1)

CURRENT KICKs

Nachos. Candy. Lots and lots of both.

Witness number one (Cousin Heather): "Woman, we are checking you into Candy rehab." 

Rebuttal (me): "NO! Look, I can stop whenever I want to...or when the candy is all gone; whatever comes first."

Witness number two-five (pub companions): "Will this nacho-fest tide you over until next week?" And "Wow, you really eat those nachos with a PASSION!"

Rebuttal (me): "hey, hey waiter!! could I get a refill on the salsa and maybe some suicide sauce, god damn I'm hungry! I'm so happy!"   

St. Louis

Me and Sam: G&P's porch

Tomorrow's Motto

Ohhhhh myyyy God!

Find a cure, find a cure for my life.

The bullshit radar* is strong in this one

Dexter: what's in that wall panel?

Me: a time vortex spanning the universe.

Dexter: I don't believe you. It's too thin.

Me: that's the glory of the time vortex; it fits in small spaces.

Dexter: time vortexes don't exist. 

Me: how do you know? I mean really, How Do You Know?

Dexter: I've never seen one.

Me: you've never seen a zebra. Maybe they don't exist either.

Dexter: Zebras exist. they are in books.

Me: so are time vortexes.

Dexter: yeah, but that's SciFiction Mommy. 

Me: still, how do you know zebras exist and not time vortexes?

Dexter: cause people come back from trips saying they saw zebras. no one brags about seeing a time vortex.

Me: shit. you win. 

__________________________________

*(he also called us bullshit-liars when it was  suggested God distributed peanut sauce and that he should call God [555.LOVE] to voice his upset that our local grocery store doesn't carry it.)