Today: The Zen of Potty Training

I dislike potty training. You know why? Cause there is Nothing I Can Do About it. It is the ultimate Zen test. Let be. Let go. Relinquish Control. Just Live. A person (i.e., Me) has to hand over responsibility to the Child: a 3.5 year old Irrational Beast. This was a difficult task 5 years ago with Dex, before I had learned that controlling one's anus has nothing to do with the degree of my "I'm so disappointed" tone. This Time? Fuck it. I'll put him in underwear, let him sit in his own excrement. Live it. Feel it. The problem? The child has nasty tricks up his sleeves. He doesn't mind his filth. He Enjoys it in fact. Plays in it. Quietly. Waits for me to find him all decked out in a film of shit. I have a feeling the Kingdergarden teacher is really going to disapprove of my parenting philosophy (again): wait until he feels like using the toilet. So what if he's 20 and still wearing a daiper? That's his life choice, not mine. Cause really, making someone do something (love you, lose weight, put their socks in the dirty clothes) is impossible. Unless duct tape is involved.