Went to the country; ate a lot of peaches

Unsolved mysteries:

1. watching fatal attraction at 5 a.m. on the airplane is a fine way to spend the early morning.

2. The woods makes my boobs bigger. 

3. getting there: aged me five years. mountain water: revitalized me. returning to civilization: nearly killed me. 

4. Lewis + airplane seatbelt = toddler on amphetamines. 

5. Mucking around for hours in the deep woods is fun.  

6. Maritime friendliness is jarring juxtaposed to my acquired central-canadian surliness.  

7. Kids don't care about rental cars. Not at all. Not one little bit. 

8. Rocket launchers are heavy and boys like it when girls try to lift them.

9. I was raised wild. I had forgotten.

10. beaches are the secret to the universe (or to concentrated fun-ness)

11. frogs are endlessly entertaining. As are ponds. And decaying ocean creatures. 

12. peaches are delicious.

Mysteries solved

1. cheap plan tickets usually mean waking up and driving at 3 a.m. 

2. children who wake up at 3 a.m. suck by 10 a.m.

3. dial-up internet keeps a person from wasting their life online.

4. tv fills the internet void

5. work is ridiculously lame and seemingly unimportant compared to simple forest living.